Lately I have been plagued with the idea of Self Expression. I have always been a person whom is very expressive in what I wear and how I present myself to the world, including tattoos, piercings, and often somewhat different clothing style. Still even having a more alternative style I still spend quite a bit of time figuring out what I am going to wear and making sure that it not only matched how I was feeling, but that it also looked good.
However as I have been a little more detailed and particular about how I look when I go out, some people have given me flack about my particulars. Many will mention about how it is vane, or how I should not care a) what people think of me or b) what I look like. Seeing the whole process as something a bit more materialistic.
Here are my feelings on the whole process though. It is healthy to be expressive and want to present yourself in a way that makes you not only feel good; but also something that matches your expression of your Higher Self. For when you are uncomfortable about the way you are here, then you can not aspire to higher states.
One of my favorite new phrases is “accept and aspire” from Kisma Awake. This means that until we are happy with ourselves, with our situations, with our environments (or at least accept where we are) can we really change or do anything about them. If you are unhappy in some way with any of these, you first need to accept where you are. You do not have to like or love it, particularly if you are in a very bad situation. Still you need to accept the reality of what is going on, without rose tinted glasses. Once you accept you can aspire.
The great thing about stepping back and accepting the situation first, it gives you a real starting point from which to base an action plan of aspiring. Further it takes away a lot of expectations and judgements. We know where we are at this point honestly, so we know exactly what we are capable of without adding unneeded stress and expectations to the problems. Also we lose our ability to judge ourselves harshly. We are being realistic and honest about the situation, and in honesty there is no judgement just facts. When we remove the expectations and judgements regarding our situation that make us unhappy we remove a lot of stress and obstacles that keep us from creating something better.
More often than not when we can not see to get ourselves out of situations that we dislike it is because we are creating our own obstacles. We are refusing to see a solutions, or the things that we often do to create and keep us in the situations we are in. Sometimes we can not even see the silver lining or how we can make even an impossible situation a little bit more bearable and positive. So when we step back and accept what is happening, solutions and revelations will often hit us and allow us to aspire to greater heights.
We have to accept that we are the ones that create the world around us. We are the ones that form relationships, we are the ones that choose to absorb the things people say, we are the ones that allow ourselves to spiral into the worse case scenario and be unhappy. When we see our situations as they are, we stop blaming other people, stop blaming ourselves, and take charge of the change that needs to happen so that we can be happy.
Coming to terms with where we are in the places we do not like allow us to remove the stress and expectations that hold us back. Allows us to create a greater future by taking charge of our lives and our situations to create the dreams we all wish to have.
Practice in Peace and Love ❤